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kaylapocalypse:

ktcorn:

courtesycalling:

kaylapocalypse:

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 If there was a zombie apocalypse the best place to go would be Target.

Lets look at the facts:

  • Targets have at maximum 3 windows. And those windows are also doors. Otherwise they are giant concrete cinder-blocks of prison like retail. 
  • Target is filled with things to quickly barricade those window-doors. such as entire gazebos, lawn furniture, exercise equipment, etc. 
  • From that point forward all you have to do is worry about the zombies that are inside.
  • Target has an intercom system, which if accessed by the correct people can be used to quickly spread information and mobilize people to get things done. 
  • Target has a large section of both perishable and non perishable food items. 
  • Target also has a vast entertainment section. (how many societies have collapsed due to conflict spurred by stress and boredom. HOW MANY)
  • Target’s roof can be easily accessed for surveillance, gathering of rainwater (with the many buckets and mini pools target has. and all water can be boiled in the Starbucks kitchen) and sniping.
  • Target’s insulation would make the harsh winter months significantly more bearable.
  • Before the power goes out, Target has sun lights (which is why its not sad inside like in so many other stores… cough Sears cough) so people who have SAD won’t get depressed. Also, Target is large and designed to feel homey so people wont go stir crazy as fast like they do in jails.
  • When the power goes out, Target has large industrial generators that can be turned on in emergencies like for cooking. 
  • Speaking of cooking, Target has several kitchens inside of it. And once the power goes, guess what Target also sells? Grills. 
  • Target also has a pharmacy. And medical supplies. So, people inside who need meds to function have a hell of a lot longer time to live unencumbered by their illness than they normally would. 
  • Some targets have tools–including power tools.
  • Target also has a tiny jail. For miscreants and rabble rousers.
  • Bedding. Real Bedding
  • Reliable indoor plumbing.

I think you could reasonably live for at least two years inside a Target before completely running out of anything vital– provided food is well rationed.
And even so, the only thing you’d be sending out scouts for is food. Everything else would last for ages.  

Provided that the population not exceed 200, Target would run out of these things in this order:

  1. perishable food.
  2. electricity
  3. Potable water (that doesn’t require work)
  4. Non perishable pre-made food items
  5. Non perishable food ingredients (flour, mixes, etc)

    How to survive in a Target: Action plan.

    Undoubtedly, everyone will be rushing and screaming in the Target. First someone has to break into the manager’s office and commandeer the intercom to create some organization by shouting: If you do not want to stay and survive in the Target, leave now. 

    After that’s cleared up and only interested parties and zombies are left. the barricading can begin. Once the doors and windows are sealed, the new goal is to clear the undead from the usable space.The undead can be deposited neatly outside of the truck loading dock doors.

    Then, someone needs to do inventory. For the next week or so, food needs to be arranged by date consumed and a rationing chart should be made. Same applies to medicine and medical supplies and toiletries.

    After food and water has been qualified and quantified,  remaining time should be dedicated to turning target into a large “home”, Bedding should be laid out in one area, there should be an entertainment area. There should be a separate area for children and babies. All of the clothing should be pushed to the side or placed in the storage area, so there is more livable space. 

    I’m sure people have more ideas but that’s all I’ve got.

This has been brought to you with love by,

Not gonna die. 

Yes, but what about a Costco? It has the same advantages, and everything is scaled up by, at the very least, five.

Walmart has guns though

Y’all wanna live at costco where there is no bedding and its literally a depressing warehouse or at Walmart where there is no bedding but there’s guns and the sort of people who regularly arrive at walmart

fine

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Have fun with that. See y’all in 2-5 years with our healthy well adjusted small population that survived because of quality planning and the little things humans need to keep happy and sane (sun lights through the whole store, a fully stocked pharmacy, baby care/supplies/cribs, a medium sized selection of books for when all the electronics stop working and we all need entertainment); rather than on edge and survivalist because  guns. 

You don’t need guns if you’re not planning on going outside.

Also, guns run out of bullets. A better weapon is a baseball bat. Which can be used as as both assault and defense, doesn’t  become useless even when bent, doesn’t need to recharge or reload, and can be used by anyone with a decent grip and swing with no need for serious weapons training. Of which they sell many at Target.

You wanna try me?

i’ve thought of everything. 

— 

Though, as walmart, target and costco all have truck loading via back entrance–We could plausibly create a system of trade using delivery trucks as a way to travel and create a small scale indoor economy.  In which no one ever has to go outside because that’s zombie territory these days.